Help your child connect with other queer and trans young people

As described in the Level-Setting 2 page, the internet offers a host of benefits for queer and trans young people, as well as challenges. One of the most impactful pluses is the ability to connect with others who share their identities, especially in a context where queer and trans young people may not know anyone else in-person who identifies or looks like they do.

Here are three potential sites to suggest to your child:

• Give Us The Floor
• imi
• Q Chat Space

Interacting while in-person is critical if it's available and if your young person is comfortable with it.

• Check your local youth-serving or LGBTQA+/SGL organizations to see what they have for queer and trans tweens and teens.
  • Try their websites first.
  • If that doesn't yield any results, drop them an email or give them a call.
  • If you contact one and they don't have a group (or even if they do), they may know another place that does. So be sure to ask.
• If there's an organization with a support group for parents raising queer or trans children, tweens, or teens, see if they have a group or groups specifically for queer or trans young people themselves.
  • To find a group, start with PFLAG. A particular chapter may not have coinciding groups for young people. But they may know of a local group that does.
• Find out if there's an LGBTQA+/SGL community center in your area. They may have a group for young people or may know where you could find one.
  • As one of my survey-takers said, "In communities with access to LGBT centers, that is the most valuable resource for both lgbt people and allies to get involved and find community."
• Here are other ways to find appropriate groups for your young person.
  • If you have statewide LGBTQA+/SGL organization(s), see if they have referrals in your local community.
  • Find out if the school your queer or trans young person attends has a group.
  • See if other schools in your area have groups that are open to tweens or teens who arent enrolled there.
  • Check out Lambda Legal's Resources for LGBTQ Youth By State (PDF).
  • There are queer- and trans-focused summer camps for young people out there. These camps are designed to give queer and trans tweens and teens a break from hostile environments and to offer them a space that affirms them and helps them grow into their identity.
    • You can find a partial list of those camps at LGBTQ Summer Camps and Retreats 2023.
    • Check out the Afro Futures Youth Camp run by Garden of Peace.
    • You can find others on Google.
  • The Radical Monarchs is a trans-inclusive group for girls ages 8-11. They have a list of active troops you can check out. Each troop may not have other trans members. But it's worth looking into.
  • If those options don't work, Google your local community and see what turns up.

Support your queer or trans young person’s friends who may be questioning their identity or already out of the closet. These children or youth may not have support at home -- although doing what the family below did would be going way above & beyond.

• Family Adopts 15-Year-Old Gay Teen Who Was Disowned By His Family

See the section on the support that friends' parents can provide young people of this website for other concrete ideas.

Many queer and trans teens want to date. But dating can be fraught, especially for TGNC youth, who often need to decide when and how to come out to potential significant others.

Here are some helpful resources.

• Studies Show LGBT Youth Face Higher Risk of Dating Violence
• Study: Transgender Teens Face Unique Challenges while Dating
• Talking to LGBTQ+ Teens About Sex and Relationships
• And a very sweet story: A Dad Dropped His Son Off on a Date and It Restored My Faith in Humanity

Please do remember, though, that if your child is not interested because they're asexual or aromantic or for any other reason, that's fine!